Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
