her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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