Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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