My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
