Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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