yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
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