I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
we're so committed to being not committed
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
