is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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