dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
