I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I got chris browned last night
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
