Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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