I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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