Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Welp...herpes.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize