I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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