Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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