at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
high people should be assigned attendants
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
