wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize