she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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