Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
