just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
