i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Redeem this text for a blowjob
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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