I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
