uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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