How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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