All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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