I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
