# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
The struggles of a small town man whore
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
