Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
