i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I'm both gender and math confused
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
