Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
