ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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