i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
