Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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