One girl and one boy is just not enough.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
