Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
