I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
