I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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