But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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