....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
