I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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