It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize