I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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