hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
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