Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Randomize
