About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize