you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
