$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I think your dad took our porno
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
