You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
