Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
