I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
