dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
